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Madam Red with Grell Sutcliff

Madam Red with Grell Sutcliff (Photo credit: davidyuweb)

Hey guys, it is fischfail, I’ve been gone for a while once again, and it is not something I am going to apologize for again. But I can offer a brief explanation as to my whereabouts…

Like I said, I’ve been going for a while, so long in fact that I (just like every other author we have) missed deadlines for contests that we had running, as well as our second birthday.

Now, you may be asking yourself: “What? You mean this place has actually been around for over two fucking years now?” But more than likely, you are asking “Why does that actually matter? You guys didn’t do shit, and it is only your fault that no one celebrated it…”

And that is true, to an extent. I’ve been busy, ErinLovesTheWeb has been busy, fucking LuzOb has been busy… We have all been fucking busy, and none of us have been spending much time around here lately.

Shit happens…

Either way, I’m saying this right here, right now: both the “FFI’s Next Top Model” and “FFI’s Logo Design Contest” will run another full fucking year.

But that is not the only fucking awesome news… No! We are also starting a new fucking contest. You guys have heard me discus the concept of “I’m Addicting to Your Mom” and you guys can become part of it. It is very simple, tell us a story, any story, if we like it, we will have fun with it.

For instance, maybe there was a time you got stuck in a couch; maybe, just maybe you tickled a moose’s vagina; maybe you lost your virginity to an entire testosterone fueled football team; whatever your story is, as long as it is real, tell us. We want to hear all about it.

Don’t worry, all the above information will have its own page right here on the blog, with all the rules and requirements that go along with it.

Seriously you guys, we know you visit us, we know you read us… Make us hear you; yell at us, talk to us, fuck you can even throw us a ham sandwich. We don’t care, just speak up, chime in, and let us know what you are thinking.
And I don’t want to hear any shit about “well, you guys do not have accounts on any of the things I like!” To that, good Sir or Madam, I call bullshit. We are constantly growing and digging our odd sense of humor into more and more locations around the interwebs…

Maybe you like forums, well you can click this fucking link here: Forums

Maybe, you prefer facebook: Facebook or even Facebook fan page

Twitter?

Reddit?

Tumblr?

Digg?

Youtube?

Delicious?

Linked In?

Maybe you prefer to text me personally? Sure, not a fucking problem, just dial 1-734-252-6387 into whatever fucking fancy mobile device is in your pocket. Send me a text message; send me a picture; fuck, send me a fucking voice mail. I don’t care.

Or perhaps you like only communicating via e-mail? Again, not a fucking problem, send me a fucking message at: Gmail, Hotmail, even motherfucking Yahoo?

See what I mean? We can be found all over the fucking place! And the best part is? Those aren’t even half of them… Seriously, look us up, we can be contacted and any way you see fit!Not to mention, here at the home of Fisch Fail, INC.

Seriously, at any of those fucking places can you send me comments, pictures, videos, whatever you want… We want to hear from you. Make it happen.

Now that I am done on my soapbox, we will see you later… And don’t forget to check out the contest sections listed above. Seriously, you guys might learn some new shit!

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Comments
  1. fischfailfrog says:

    Looks like you channeled some awesome there, good fucking job! But…

    About fucking time you got off your fat fucking lazy-ass you fuck piece of fucking shit, sonofabitch you! If I weren’t so goddamned busy being fucking amazing, I could come over there, jump down your big ass gullet in your sleep, tickle your fucking insides with my fucking funny looking cloaca (that is like my asshole, you dumb-fuck) until you threw up all over the fucking place and then begged for fucking mercy…

    God, you know, for being a fucking “author” and the fucking founder of this fucking place, you are awfully fucking useless. Please for the love of fuck, start getting off your fucking ass and doing some shit for your fucking blog, you goddamned moron.

    On a final note: croak!

    After all, the bitches do be loving the croak…

    • fischfail says:

      Well, looks like some little green piece of shit got out of there fucking muddy hole and decided to visit the fucking blog he works for…

      Where you been at you little fuck? What are you too fucking famous now to stop by, you fucking asshole?

      • fischfailfrog says:

        Oh, like your one to fucking talk, you fat greasy fuck-wad!

        And where the fuck are those other fucks you call “authors”? Surely they are apart of the circle-jerk you fucks call Fisch Fail, Inc. My god, maybe if you guys took each others cocks out of your fucking mouth for a while, this shit wouldn’t be fucking dying…

        Don’t let me see your big ass walking down the fucking street at night, I will fuck you up worse than that fucking time you got robbed for a candy bar you fat fuck!

        • fischfail says:

          Please come back this way you ugly little fuck. It has been far too long since that last time I had some fun playing fucking frog baseball.

          I’ve got Drezirale’s bat just waiting for your cloaca and LuzOb fucking crossbow ready for your ugly fucking mouth.

          You want to start some shit, you little fuck? I challenge you come and meet me… You know where I fucking live!

  2. MoonPie says:

    Wow Very interesting Conversations!
    So many F-bombs its ridiculous!

  3. luzob says:

    protip to you mr. frog… your cloaca is your asshole AND peehole…

    • fischfailfrog says:

      You bearded fuck, you don’t think I don’t know the fucking shit about my own goddamned body? You are a fucking fuck as well!

      • luzob says:

        shit at least i can grow a beard, you little green twat

        • fischfailfrog says:

          That is okay, you fuck, I just ninja’d my way into your fucking house, and dropped a big fucking shit, right in your fucking tea! I mean, you probably won’t fucking notice, it looks just like that fucking Samurai Chai bullshit you seem to fucking like.

          You want to fucking fight, bro? I will kick your fucking ass back to fucking China, you fucking fuck!

          • luzob says:

            I’d call you a scaly, green cunt, but you’re not even badass enough for scales. Go nom on a fly, you web-footed asshat, while I enjoy prehensile thumbs and my shit-tea. Also strange that you knew the actual name of the tea I drink, apparently you’re a connoisseur, you Kermit-the-Queef motherfuck.

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