Praise the Gods for all the Gifts They Give

Posted: September 9, 2012 by fischfail in Random
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
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Hey guys, I’m not sure why this was never posted, although there is several authors who could have posted this particular story.Viking longship

So, I will tell it. At least as well as my fading memory will allow me to. If I am missing something, I apologize, but perhaps LuzOb, Drezirale, or Ullersson could fill in the blanks, they were there as well.

I don’t remember the date, and even to attempt to give one would be an insult to all of you, I do know it was a warm night in June or July (another reason some of my memories are fading).

But first, go ahead and click play on the song below and continue reading.

The plans had been made, LuzOb and Ullersson were going to meet for drink, cigars, and all the festivities that go along with those. And that is were the story begins. Soon after Drezirale joined the party.

I was locked away in my room, because I was feeling unwell and I decided I required a cigarette. And that is where I join the story, although my beginning was not long after the beginning of their story.

Upon taking a seat on the porch, LuzOb states “Here ya’ go, brother” and hands me a beer (the exact type has long escaped the confines of my memory).

After another three alcoholic beverages and several cigarettes, I am suddenly feeling much better. I stand and look to my left and finally see the true plans of the evening, three bottles of the very delicious Viking Blod Mead.

A bottle of "Viking Blod"

This particular image retrieved from

I remember the first time I had the stuff, it was like the Gods had came in my mouth and for the first time in my life I could see and I could actually taste a rainbow. It was amazing.

I actually have no clue what appearance my face took on, but I am almost 100% positive it looked a little like this:

Me gusta rage face

I can distinctly remember Ullersson seeing the look on my face, whatever it may be, leaning down, grabbing a bottle by the smooth ceramic neck pulling the hallowed cork from its resting place and extending his arm to me.

“You can have a drink, but only after you’ve made toast to the Gods…”

I would love to repeat the small prayer I made, although it is sacred and I cannot (and I have no clue as to what I said anymore). And drank deeply of the sweet nectar from within. I returned the bottle to its owner and stood around talking with the other authors in attendance. Ullersson was the next to pass praise and take a draught.

Before I knew it LuzOb, Drezirale, Ullersson, and my self have formed a small circle, always passing the bottle to our left. With the each of us making our own praise before the bottle touches our lips. The continues until the bottle has run dry. A sad time indeed, and we all temporarily separate to smoke our chosen form of tobacco.

About halfway through the cigar that Ullersson was taking aromatic mouthfuls of, he decided we were not finished celebrating the Gods.

He grabbed the second bottle, removed the damming cork, made a quiet prayer and drank deeply once more. The celebratory circle commenced very soon after.

A few more rounds and this bottle joins its fallen brethren in the Empty Bottle Graveyard that every person seems to visit from time to time. It is after this second bottle that I proudly (and drunkenly, I admit) announce that I would like to wrestle. I don’t remember who, but someone agreed to it… Providing it was me versus the three of them.

Drunk Challenge Accepted Rage Face

Soon after the three circle around me, forming a triangle of attacking terror. Drezirale is the first to launch his attack charging at me from my left side.

Thinking quickly, I launch my counter and setting myself up, grab the running Drezirale and apply a well trained hip-toss.

Military hand-to-hand hip toss

Slamming the poor unsuspecting Drezirale to his back and on the ground. Quickly and letting pure instincts take over, I dropped across his chest, and quickly delivered the cuep de grace. A fierce punch to the throat (or at least it would have been had I actually been trying to end a real fight).

On ground punch to throat

All while managing to keep my eyes locked firmly on the eyes of the remaining two attackers, LuzOb and Ullersson, which means I am sure that I appeared a little like:

Steve Buscemi rendering

Maybe a little less haggard. It’s nothing personal, Steve, we here at Fisch Fail, INC. love you!

Leaping up and returning to a fighting stance, both LuzOb and Ullersson back out of the fight. They had seen enough.

After we all acknowledge the “fight” had reached its apex, we return to the area where we were drinking. In celebration and cheer, we decide to break open the third and final bottle. Not that we actually needed it.

A few more prayers later, we all decided we have drank enough… for now.

Relaxing for a bit, we decide to return to beer and other liquors.

A little while later, we can an end to night. Sweaty, dirty, drunk, happy, and slightly sleepy

And that my friends is where this story ends for the evening.

Stay Thristy

  1. luzob says:

    Don’t forget the Chee-tos and heartburn!

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